Archive for September, 2005

A father asked his son,

September 27th, 2005

A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees.
“I don’t want to know!” Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong.
“Oh Pop,” Johnny sobbed, “for me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you’re telling me now that grownups don’t really fuck, I’ve got nothing left to believe in!”

wyldrob R Jokes

A couple had debated a

September 15th, 2005
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A couple had debated a new car purchase for weeks. He wanted a new truck to haul stuff; she wanted a sporty car to zip through traffic. He would have settled on a beat up old truck; she wanted anything that was out of their price range. “I’ve got a birthday coming up. Surprise me with something that goes from 0 to 180 in less than five seconds!” So he bought her a bathroom scale. Services are pending.

wyldrob G Jokes

No, I am not Dead

September 15th, 2005
:: Currently listening to: Smile Empty Soul – Nowhere Kids :::

Gee has it really been that long since I wrote something here? Where are all the people who are supposed to encourage me to write daily (or almost daily)? I can’t believe no one has complained that I have not written in so long.
Anyway, not much new in the life of wyldrob. I am still working at the hospital – in computer services. I try to get overtime when it’s available, which for a while now, it hasn’t been too hard to get. I am not complaining about it either! I do like the OT. Of course if they just gave me a raise, I might not have to work all the OT to have some extra money. I am hoping that comes soon, but I am not getting my hopes up about it. Cuz, I think it’s likely to be a while before I see any extra money.
New TV shows are starting this week. I still need to watch House, MD from the other night. I am also still looking for Cold Case, and Medium from Sunday and Monday nights. This is the bad part of working second shift. I am never home to watch prime time TV shows. I need to get TIVO or something. I think in the meantime I’ll have to stick with my ancient VCR to record the shows. They used to get posted on torrent sites, but those are getting harder to find. Anyone know of any good torrent sites?
I want to build a new PC. Does anyone want to contribute to the “Robbie’s Computer” Fund? I figure it will be after the first of the year before I can make it happen. At least my stuff isn’t dead – not yet anyway. So it’s not like I have to have it right now. I just want something a little faster. I am not even sure what sort of system I will build. I know I have a lot of research to do. Things have changed so much since the last time I built a computer – about three years ago. I don’t want to purchase something that is going to be incompatible. I’ll do more searching on that when it comes time to build.
So who has something interesting to share?

wyldrob Uncategorized

Want Some Tiger Meat?

September 13th, 2005

SHANGHAI, China – The Hufulou restaurant in northeastern China said they were selling illegal tiger meat dishes, but they were really cooking up donkey flesh – marinated in tiger urine. The so-called stir-fried tiger meat with chilies was going for $98, and raw meat was priced at $864 a kilogram. Officers who came to shut down the restaurant were told that the meat was actually from donkeys, flavored with tiger urine to give the dish a “special” tang. Authorities confiscated the restaurant’s profits and fined the owner, Ma Shikun, about $300.

wyldrob Uncategorized

Woman Dies While Peeing

September 13th, 2005

BRUSSELS – A drunk Belgian woman’s urgent need to relieve herself became a grave matter when she died in a freak accident in the early hours of Saturday. The 33-year-old woman was walking home from a bar and decided to take a short cut through a cemetery. That’s when the need to pee became so strong that she decided to relieve herself between two gravestones. As she was in a crouched position, she lost her balance and grabbed one of the stones. The stone gave way and landed on top of her, killing her. She died of suffocation because she couldn’t lift the heavy stone, the public prosecutor’s office said.

wyldrob Weird News

Cuffed Suspect Drives Off in Police Cruiser

September 5th, 2005

HIGHLAND PARK, Mich. – Being handcuffed behind his back wasn’t enough to stop a vandalism suspect from driving away in a Wayne County Sheriff’s Department cruiser.
Deputies answered a call about a man throwing rocks at a house in Highland Park about 5:50 a.m. Sunday, Deputy Chief Robert Dickerson said. They interviewed the alleged victim, then placed traditional bracelet-style handcuffs on the suspect and put him in the back seat.
The man managed to drive away, and the car was found abandoned several blocks away nearly six hours later, sheriff’s spokesman John Roach told the Detroit Free Press. The suspect remained at large.
“It’s happened before other times,” Dickerson said. “This gentleman has a rather small frame, about 5 feet, 7 inches, and if the cuffs are not on tight, they can slip off.”
It was not clear where the deputies were at the time the cruiser was driven away.

wyldrob Weird News

Never Refuse a Lap Dance from This Woman…

September 5th, 2005

LOS ANGELES – When a customer at the Dream Girls Cabaret refused a lap dance from a topless dancer, the stripper pulled out a knife and stabbed him. Lawanda Dixon was arrested for assault with a deadly weapon after the alter- cation with Melik Jordan early on Wednesday. “He was in the club with some friends watching the shows when she came up and asked if he wanted a lap dance,” San Diego police Det. Gary Hassen said. “He said no, she got upset about it, they argued back and forth. She pulled knife out of her bag and stabbed him.”

wyldrob Weird News

Maybe He Should Have Brought a Flashlight

September 5th, 2005

NEW ZEALAND – Hastings police say that a 19-year-old thief is lucky to be alive. The cops were called to a farm around 2 a.m., after a man was seen trying to steal gasoline from a vehicle. However, the thief had a flaw in his brilliant plan. He was using a cigarette lighter to see what he was doing. The flame got a little to close to the gas fumes and the car went up in flames. The man was lucky that he didn’t blow himself up, say police. He has been charged with theft.

wyldrob Dumb Crooks