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Archive for February, 2005

Bored Out of My Mind

February 26th, 2005
:: Currently listening to: Blues Traveler – Maybe I’m Wrong ::

How often does this happen to you? I am sitting here bored out of my mind. There is no one online with whom to chat. I have things I could be doing around the house, but I don’t want to do those either. I am kind of tired, but just not ready to hit the sack just yet.
I made a round trip to Vidalia last night. That was fun. I was there about three hours before turning around and coming back home. I saw a few deer on the way home too. I am certainly glad they decided not to cross the road in front of me. That wouldn’t have been good! I have one wrecked vehicle, I sure as hell don’t need two of them!
Daddy visited me later this afternoon. He called me about 3 or so and wanted me to install his amp, so I told him to come on down. Well what I thought would have taken about two or three hours has turned into three hours and counting. I got all the wires routed to the truck like I want them. I finally pulled his radio (after having to figure out how the hell to take it out of the dash) and found he has no RCA outputs on his damn stereo. It was one that my sister had in her old car and we thought it would have the outputs on it, but we were wrong. And I guess it was shame on me for not remembering that as I was the one to install the radio into his car. I told him that he has a few options, one is to get a converter to convert speaker level inputs to low-level inputs, or buy a new stereo. He says he’ll probably just buy a new radio as this one is old anyway and it doesn’t sound that great anyway. He is supposed to come back tomorrow for us to go purchase whatever he decides. Then I get the joy of installing it. Hopefully it’ll only take me about an hour to do the rest of it. I guess We’ll see tomorrow.
I start my new job Monday. This should be really interesting. I am just gonna say that I am going to be some sort of computer support for one of the local hospitals. I just hope that I like this job. I think there are certian aspects that I might not be crazy about. But at least it is a good paying job and all that good stuff. Not to mention it is working with computers which is what I’ve been trying to get into for years now. I hope this is a job that I can settle into and stay for a long time. I am tired of getting a new job every couple of years. So cross your fingers for me!

wyldrob personal

This Is Why You Should Never Throw Out Your Lit Cigarettes

February 22nd, 2005

SAN FRANCISCO – A man barely escaped serious injury Thursday after a lit cigarette he tried to toss out the window while driving across the Bay Bridge blew back in and ignited the vehicle, according to the California Highway Patrol.
The unidentified man was driving westbound at about 10:40 a.m. when he tossed the cigarette out the window of his Ford Expedition, said CHP Officer Shawn Chase.
Carried by the wind, the cigarette landed in his back seat and almost immediately burst into flames. The man quickly pulled to the side of the road, and leaped from the flame-filled SUV, which continued rolling into a guard rail, Chase said.
“He thought he had thrown it in park, but he didn’t and it just kept going,” the officer said.
“It was in flames by the time he got out. He had some of his hair singed on the back of his head. It burnt down to the frame. There was nothing left.” The incident forced the closure of the Harrison Street off-ramp and one lane of traffic flowing into the city for about an hour.
He said the man will likely face a misdemeanor charge for littering.
“We see people throwing cigarettes out the window all the time but never a situation like this where it comes back in,” Chase said. “This guy was lucky.”

wyldrob Uncategorized

How They Gonna Read That?

February 22nd, 2005

Anxious to ‘include’ as many minorities, religions and disabilities as possible, the human resources department of the University of Alberta has put up a Braille poster outside its main office. The poster has been placed inside a display case with a glass front.

wyldrob Weird News

New Job

February 21st, 2005
:: Currently listening to: Soul Coughing – Circles ::

How many times have you heard me talk about I have been looking for a new job? Well, I remember a few times on here. And since no one has offered to help me, I had to fine one myself. I start my new job in just over a week. I am not sure how well I will like it. I certainly hope I do tho! For privacy reasons I won’t say right now what I’ll be doing. Yeah that sort of makes it sound illegal, doesn’t it? Well for all you know it might be! I won’t say anymore!
IT seems that my life has gotten so boring that I never even have anything to write about in here. What is this all about? I think I just need to make up some stuff on here all the time just so you have something to read. I know I have one or two loyal readers out there. And yes you know who you are. Feel free to comment on here!
Does anyone have any experience with retrieving data from a failed hard drive? I got my mom’s computer last week and found it had a bad hard drive. This is kind of bad because I just put that drive in there a little more than a year ago. Of course this drive was a refurb. Unfortunately this time I was unable to retried *any* data as I was able to do before when the machine died. Of course this time it is giving a different error. Every computer I have put that drive in says ” drive failed” and the BIOS disables the drive. I checked with a couple of data recovery specialist and they want tons and tons of money to retrieve the data. Well, as we aren’t rich people, we can’t really afford to pay all that. I was just hoping someone had an idea that perhaps I can try. And from what these people charge it makes me think I should try to get into that business! I knew it would be kind of high, but I wasn’t expecting almost $3000 for a 30 GB drive.
One good thing did happen today. Jeff Gordon won the Daytona 500! I was glad to see him win, although I would have rather seen Jimmy Johnson up there. Just as long as it wasn’t Dale, Jr! I think Johnson made some bad decisions toward the end of the race. Better luck next time. Yeah, I am somewhat of a NASCAR fan. I am not into as much as some people, but I do enjoy watching it. One of these days I am going to go to one of the races. Of course I hear you can actually see more of the action on TV because of the mulitple cameras and such. We’ll see what happens tho. Although I don’t foresee Jason heading out to a race with me. Who knows tho. For now, I will be content on watching it on TV.
Til next time, enjoy yourselves!

wyldrob personal

A man came home from

February 20th, 2005
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A man came home from work to find his son crying on the front porch. He sat down beside him to console him. “What’s wrong, son?” The boy sobbed, “Remember last weekend, when I caught you putting a little brother inside Mommy? Well, this morning I caught the mailman eating him!”

wyldrob Adult Jokes

Dumb ass People

February 18th, 2005
:: Currently listening to: Hanson – Weird (Desmond Child Mix) ::

Why oh why do people have to complain about a website when it is their problem? This totally annoys me. As a web designer I know I am liable to make mistakes in code and some things will not appear the same on some people’s computers. But why in the fuck would you ever think that I would have a website that would require some porno shit to be installed on your computer? I mean think about it, do any of my site promote porno? No, I don’t think so! Of course I am not talking about my site, but rather my mom’s site. She had some idiot woman asking why the site would require some porno stuff to be installed!
First off, if you are getting XXX pop ups or stuff from reputable web sites first thing you should do is check your computer for spy ware and viruses! And secondly, get rid of that stupid ass browser, Internet Explorer. You should switch to Mozilla Firefox Once you have gotten rid of all the spy ware from your computer, then and only then should you write the owner of the website and whine about getting pop ups!
OK, I am off my soapbox now! And remember to make the switch to Firefox today!

wyldrob soapbox

Four brothers, all successful professionals,

February 16th, 2005
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Four brothers, all successful professionals, enjoyed a nice dinner together and afterwards, discussed the gifts they had given to their elderly mother. Milton said, “I had a big house built for Mama.” Michael said, “I had a $100,000 theater added onto that house.” Marvin said, “I had the Mercedes dealer deliver a brand-new SL600 to her.” Melvin said, “That’s nothing. Because Mama loved to read the Bible until her eyes went bad, I found a preacher who had spent years training a parrot to recite the Bible word for word. He loved that parrot so much that he wouldn’t part with it, but finally, when I pledged $100,000 a year for the next twenty years, he agreed to send it to her. Now she can just name a chapter and verse and that parrot will recite it to her!” His brothers were duly impressed. Later, Mama wrote each of them a thank you note. “Milton, the house you built is so huge that I live in only one room. Yet I still have to clean the whole house. But, thanks anyway.” “Michael, you gave me an expensive theater that seats 50, but most of my friends are dead and I’m nearly deaf and blind. I never use it. But thanks for the nice gesture.” “Marvin, I’m too old to drive, so I never use your Mercedes, but the thought was nice. Thank you.” “Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to put some thought into your gift. The chicken was delicious. Thank you.”

wyldrob G Jokes

A waiter was working one

February 11th, 2005
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A waiter was working one night, when a beautiful Blonde was seated in his section. He went over to take her order, and saw that she was crying.
“What’s wrong, miss? Are you OK?” he asked.
Wiping tears from her eyes, she looked up at him and said, “My boyfriend just dumped me, and today is my birthday. Nice gift, isn’t it?”
The waiter talked with her a few moments, and was able to get her to stop crying. He kept a close eye on her, and when she had finished her meal, he went into the kitchen, cut a large slice from the best cake on the menu, and stuck a candle in it. He lit the candle, and brought it to her table. She looked very happy, and he was glad. He said, “Make a wish and blow!”
She closed her eyes, and made her wish. Then she came up to the waiter, got down on her knees, unzipped his pants, pulled out his cock, and started sucking on it. He had no idea why she was doing this, but she was really into it, sucking away, and playing with his balls. He knew that he should stop her-they didn’t even know each others names-but hey, when you’ve got a hot blonde sucking on your cock, like you’re really going to say, no don’t suck it.
He stood there, enjoying every moment, and when she made him cum, he exploded inside her mouth, and she swallowed every drop of his huge, hot load. She looked up at him with a smile, and said, “Did you like it?”
He said, “Yes, of course, you suck cock great…but I’m just wondering why you suddenly started sucking my cock??”
She looked confused. “Well, I was just doing what you told me to.”
Now he’s confused. “What I told you to?”
Smiling, she says, “Don’t tell me you forgot already…You said, ‘Make a wish and blow!’”

wyldrob Adult Jokes

Bob was driving home after

February 11th, 2005
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Bob was driving home after a day at the construction site; over the Golden Gate Bridge at about 90mph.
Wouldn’t you know a cop jumped out and clocked him with radar. Bob pulled over like a good citizen; recalling Rodney King and recent illegal alien incidents.
The cop walked up to the window and said, “You know how fast you were going BOY?” Ignoring Bob, the officer continued, in his normal charming fashion, “That’s speeding and your getting a ticket and a fine!”
The cop took a good look at the young bob and said, “You don’t even look like you have a job! Why I’ve never seen anyone so scruffy in my entire life!”
Bob said, “I’ve got a job! I have a good, well paying job!”
The cop leaned in the window, and with the smell of day old donuts on his breath, said, “What kind of a job would a bum like you have?”
“I’m a cunt stretcher,” replied Bob.
“What you say, BOY?!!” asked the patrolman. “A cunt stretcher.”
Of course the cop asked, “What’s a cunt stretcher do?”
Bob explained, “Girls call me up and say they want to be stretched so I go over there and start with a couple of fingers, then a couple more, and then one whole hand, then two. Then I pull them farther and farther apart until it’s six feet across.”
The cop, absorbed with the images in his mind, let down his guard and asked, “What the hell do you do with a six foot cunt?”
Bob nonchalantly commented, “You give it a radar gun and stick it at the end of a bridge!”

wyldrob Adult Jokes

There’s No Place Like Home

February 10th, 2005

SHAKER HEIGHTS, Ohio – Police in Shaker Heights had to deal with a case unlike any others – that of a stolen house. According to officers, owner Jon Thomas returned to his parent’s residence to discover strangers living inside. Thomas’ parents had moved to an assisted living center back in 2000, and Thomas discovered the new residents right before Christmas of 2003. After reporting the stolen house to police, it took a year of investigation before authorities busted Richard Lenard on a charge of grand theft. Police said they never handled a case like this one before. Lenard’s attorney suggests that Lenard was a victim of fraud, believing he had purchased the home from the rightful owner.

wyldrob Weird News