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Archive for July, 2004

Another boring night

July 29th, 2004
::Currently listening to: Bon Jovi – I’ll Be There For You::

Yep, I am sitting here again for another boring night. Not much to do at this hour except stare at the four walls. This is more of the joys of working second shift. I did go over and visit with Regina for a bit. I had to go over and get my package that came for one thing. She took it from my porch because she thought it was going to rain and wasn’t sure if it was something that would hurt to get wet. Well I am glad she was thoughtful enough for that. We sat and talked about work for a bit, but not much of anything of importance.
Not much happened at work today. Big whoop, right? The next couple of days are going to be kind of rough tho as the changeover is going on. And by the time we get all the bugs out and get everything running half way decent it will be time to changeover once again. There is still of course no word on having a day off. Certain people seem to think I am going to be going all out of my way to help them if I do have a day off. I have news for them, when I finally get a day off, I am probably going to just sit around the damn house all day and do nothing! I’ll need some time to rest.
OK, so there are my few words for tonight.

wyldrob personal

shaking head

July 28th, 2004
::Currently listening to: Bon Jovi – Never Say Goodbye::

I am sitting here shaking my head. Ginny called me a little while to say my obituary was in the paper today. I thought that was kind of funny. Of course the middle name doesn’t match mine when I actually went online to look. It could have been a good excuse to be off work – “Sorry I can’t come to work today because I’m dead” LOL Daddy called right after that to ask when I was coming up there to help him move. I’m like never. As I told Krista Sunday (and either she didn’t relay the message or someone wasn’t listening) I have no days off. And honestly if I do have a day off work, why the hell would i want to spend it helping someone move? Hell if I have a day off I feel certain that I’ll want to hit the Outback for happy hour!
I see that no one has volunteered to come mow the lawn for me. There was no need in trying to get up this morning to do it since it rained last night. I might try to do it tomorrow. We’ll have to wait and see. I would be willing to bet that once I get my riding mower here, I wouldn’t have to beg a certain someone to do it. Hell for that matter it would only take me like 35 or 40 minutes to do it so I really can’t see paying someone to do it then. But I am going to try to get it done tomorrow. Ginny did say she would see if Eddie would bring my riding mower to me.
I am hoping in about three more weeks I’ll be able to get the truck fixed. I am not holding my breath on it tho. Every time I think I am going to get it fixed something else comes up that requires the money I had saved for the truck. So I am crossing my fingers this time! We’ll see. Wish me luck!
Well it’s time for me to leave for work. It’s going to be fun the next couple of days because of changeover. ICK! See y’all tonight when I come home – that is if I have anything worthwhile to write.

wyldrob personal

It’s getting better

July 27th, 2004
::Currently listening to: Motley Crue – Kickstart My Heart::

Well work is getting a little better. I can honestly say I am getting used to the move I made a couple of weeks ago. The next few days are going to be rough though because we have to change part types. I have been talking to my supervisor about my raise I should have gotten over a month ago. He said he is trying to check on it. But he has to get someone out from under someone else’s desk. Of course I am not saying any names for certain reasons. But I thought that was pretty funny. He also said that the channel manager knows about the situation as well. I am hoping they retro-pay me for the time I should have gotten the raise and have not gotten it. But I have a feeling they won’t do that, but I am certainly going to ask about it.
I was going to try and get up in the morning to cut grass, but I can definately scratch that idea as we got some much needed rain. Does anyone know of someone who does lawns at a reasonable rate? I would be willing to pay someone anymore as I really can’t find the time to take care of everything. And I know my landlord is probably beside himself about it.
I came home tonight to the lights being on in the kitchen. I was kind of surprised because I know they were off when I left for work today. I figure the power much have blinked or something. I came in here with the computer and find the modem was offline. Sometimes if the lights blink the ones in the kitchen will come on automatically for some reason. It’s something to do with the X-10 switches. It’s not that big of a deal I guess. Of course it could be a big surprise if I was not expecting it! A couple of weeks ago while I was cooking they would cut off everytime the washing machine changed cycles. It was kind of funny.
Well I need to get off here. I just thought it would be nice to write a little in my much neglected blog. Now I have decide which movie I want to watch tonight! I watched Blue Streak last night. I think I’m gonna go shower and then go find something to watch. It’s not like there is anything much better to do right now. I guess if I was a club person, I would head out there. Oh well – the joys of working second shift.

wyldrob work

hmm.. made me laugh

July 24th, 2004
::Currently listening to: Don Henley – Dirty Laundry ::

I saw this article in the paper today while I was work. I just got a kick out it. How would you like your name to appear in the paper for this kind of story. This is taken from The Aiken Standard

Suspect sought for assaulting dog

By KAREN DAILY Staff writer
The Aiken County Sheriff’s Office is searching for a North Augusta man who police say sexually assaulted a brown and black dog behind an apartment complex in North Augusta Wednesday evening.
Deputies hold a buggery warrant for the arrest of Aquileo T. Recendiz, 26, of 111 Old Aiken Road, said agency spokesperson Lt. Michael Frank.
According to South Carolina law, “whoever shall commit the abominable crime of buggery, whether with mankind or with beast, shall, on conviction, be guilty of felony and shall be imprisoned in the penitentiary for five years or shall pay a fine of not less than $500, or both, at the discretion of the court.”
“We have two witnesses who saw this individual whistle to the dog and lure the dog into his grasp,” Frank said. “He then carried the dog into fenced area behind the apartment at 111 Old Aiken Road where he sexually assaulted the dog.”‘
Frank said a deputy responded and completed an incident report and interviewed Recendiz that evening.
“At the time we did not make an arrest because this is not the type of case we typically see so we had to research the South Carolina code of laws, and once we identified buggery as the proper charge, the investigator assigned to the case this morning obtained a warrant for his arrest.”
Frank said police have searched for the man, but as of late Thursday had not located him.
He is described as a 26-year-old Hispanic man with black hair and brown eyes. He 5 feet 1 inch tall and weighs 120 pounds.
Anyone with information is asked to contact investigator Chuck Cain at the Aiken County Sheriff’s Office at 1-800-922-9709.

wyldrob personal

A mother, away all week

July 24th, 2004
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A mother, away all week at a business conference, decided to phone home collect. Her six-year-old son picked up the phone and heard a stranger’s voice say, “We have a Marcia on the line. Will you accept the charges?” Frantic, he dropped the receiver and screamed, “Dad! Come quick! They’ve got Mom! And they want money!”

wyldrob G Jokes

A skinny alligator was sitting

July 21st, 2004
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A skinny alligator was sitting beside a fat alligator beside the swamp near Washington, D. C. The plump gator asked the skinny gator, “What’s the matter, Tommy? I don’t understand why you’re so skinny. We’re the same age, we grew up together. I don’t get it.” “Well,” said the skinny gator, “I eat politicians, same as you.” “Hmm. Well, where do you catch ‘em?” “At the other side of the swamp, near that parking lot.” “Me, too. Hmm. How do you catch ‘em?” “Well, I crawl up under the driver’s door of a Lexus and wait for someone to unlock it, then I jump out, grab ‘em by the leg, shake the shit out of ‘em until they’re dead, drag ‘em back here to the swamp, and eat ‘em!” “Ah!” says the big alligator, “I see your problem. Once you shake the shit out of a politician, there’s nothing left but lips and a briefcase!”

wyldrob PG Jokes

A blonde decides to try

July 21st, 2004
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A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she had no prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. As it goes along at a steady rhythmic pace, the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse’s mane, but cannot get a firm grip. She throws her arms around the horse’s neck, but slides down its side anyway. Meanwhile, the horse gallops along, ignorant of its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, the blonde attempts to leap off the horse to safety, but her foot tangles in the stirrup, and she is now at the horse’s mercy, her head striking the ground again and again. Moments before she loses consciousness, the Wal-Mart manager notices her plight and unplugs the horse.

wyldrob G Jokes

In our last venture out

July 21st, 2004
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In our last venture out for Christmas shopping, we had bought a few gadgets for the youngins and then realized we didn’t have any batteries.
I stepped over to the counter to get the batteries, but I couldn’t attract any clerk’s attention.
I waited a while then said to April, “I’ll get someone’s attention. Stay right here.” With that, I pulled out a tape measure I just happened to have with me, and started to “measure” one of those large screen plasma television sets. You know, the ones that go for about $4000.
Amazingly, a clerk almost leap-frogged over several pieces of furniture to reach my side.
“Sir! Can I help you?” he exclaimed.
“Yeah, you can. I’ll take 8 of those batteries over there.”

wyldrob G Jokes

I remember one morning at

July 21st, 2004
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I remember one morning at quarters, the Division Officer said, “All right, you assholes, fall out!”
As the rest of the division wandered away, I remained at attention.
The Division Officer walked over until he was eye-to-eye with me. Then he raised a single eyebrow.
I just smiled and said, “Sure were a lot of ‘em, huh, sir?”

wyldrob Uncategorized

I found this in old

July 19th, 2004

I found this in old email and thought it was hilarious….
ABBOTT: Ultimate SuperDuper Computer Store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I’m setting up a home office in the den, and I’m thinking of buying a computer.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name is Lou.
ABBOTT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don’t own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name is Lou.
ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Does it get stuffy?
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don’t know. What do I see when I look out the windows?
ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
ABBOTT: Software that runs on Windows?
COSTELLO: No, on the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses. You know, run a business. What have you got?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOTT: Recommended something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: Okay, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office.
ABBOTT: Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office and it already has windows! Let’s say I’m sitting at my computer, and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?
ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: If I’m writing a proposal, I’m going to need lots of words. But what program do I load?
ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: The Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: Which word in “office for windows?”
ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue W.
COSTELLO: I’m going to click your big W if you don’t give me a straight answer. Let’s forget about words for a minute. What do I need if I want to watch a movie over the Internet?
ABBOTT: RealOne.
COSTELLO: Maybe a real movie, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. But what do I need to watch it?
ABBOTT: RealOne.
COSTELLO: If it’s a long movie I’ll also want to watch reels two, three and four. Can I watch reel four?
ABBOTT: Of course.
COSTELLO: Great! With what?
ABBOTT: RealOne.
COSTELLO: Okay, so I’m sitting at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?
ABBOTT: You click the blue 1.
COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?
ABBOTT: The blue 1.
COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue W?
ABBOTT: Of course it is. The blue 1 is RealOne. The blue W is Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: But there’s three words in “office for windows!”
ABBOTT: No, just one. But it’s the most popular Word in the world.
COSTELLO: It is?
ABBOTT: Yes, although to be fair there aren’t many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words.
COSTELLO: And that word is the real one?
ABBOTT: No. RealOne has nothing to do with Word. RealOne isn’t even part of Office.
COSTELLO: Never mind; I don’t want to get started with that again. But I also need something for bank accounts, loans, and so on. What do you have to help me track my money?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That’s right. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOTT: No, not really. It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: What comes bundled with my computer?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: Money comes bundled with my computer?
ABBOTT: Exactly. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer at no extra charge? How much money do I get?
ABBOTT: Just one copy.
COSTELLO: I get a copy of money. Isn’t that illegal?
ABBOTT: No. We have a license from Microsoft to make copies of Money.
COSTELLO: Microsoft can license you to make money?
ABBOTT: Why not? They own it.
COSTELLO: Well, it’s great that I’m going to get free money, but I’ll still need to track it. Do you have anything for managing your money?
ABBOTT: Managing Your Money? That program disappeared years ago.
COSTELLO: Well, what do you sell in its place?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: You sell money?
ABBOTT: Of course. But if you buy a computer from us, you get it for free.
COSTELLO: That’s all very wonderful, but I’ll be running a business. Do you have any software for, you know, accounting?
ABBOTT: Simply Accounting.
COSTELLO: Probably, but it might get a little complicated.
ABBOTT: If you don’t want Simply Accounting, you might try M.Y.O.B.
COSTELLO: M.Y.O.B.? What does that stand for?
ABBOTT: Mind Your Own Business.
COSTELLO: I beg your pardon?
ABBOTT: No, that would be I.B.Y.P. I said M.Y.O.B.
COSTELLO: Look, I just need to do some accounting for my home business. You know.. accounting? You do it with money.
ABBOTT: Of course you can do accounting with Money. But you may need more.
COSTELLO: More money?
ABBOTT: More than Money. Money can’t do everything.
COSTELLO: I don’t need a sermon! Okay, let’s forget about money for the moment. I’m worried that my computer might… what’s the word? Crash. And if my computer crashes, what can I use to restore my data?
ABBOTT: GoBack.
COSTELLO: Okay. I’m worried about my computer smashing and I need something to restore my data. What do you recommend?
ABBOTT: GoBack.
COSTELLO: How many times do I have to repeat myself?
ABBOTT: I’ve never asked you to repeat yourself. All I said was GoBack.
COSTELLO: How can I go back if I haven’t even been anywhere? Okay, I’ll go back. What do I need to write a proposal?
ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: But I’ll need lots of words to write a proposal.
ABBOTT: No, you only need one Word … the Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: But there’s three words in… Oh, never mind.
ABBOTT: Hello? Hello? Customers! Why do they always hang up on me? Oh, well. Ultimate SuperDuper Computer Store. Can I help you?

wyldrob G Jokes